Anxiety & Stress
Lately You’ve Been Feeling Like You Just Can’t Keep Your Head Above Water
You’ve got a “To Do” list a mile long, and it just keeps growing. Just when you mark one thing off the list, another two things take its place. Not to mention, your spouse needs your attention, your kids need your attention, and work is non-stop. You’re juggling 20 things at once, and at any moment you might drop a ball.
Do you ever picture yourself in a huge lake with just your eyes and nose barely sticking out of the water, barely able to breathe? You wonder how long before you just go under.
Or it’s like you’re carrying a big, huge backpack filled to the brim with what feels like bricks? Each brick is a worry, a fear, or a nagging thought. Ever wondered what it would feel like to get rid of some of those bricks?
You’ve probably felt something like this before and you feel like you just can’t do it anymore.
You feel like no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to relax. There’s always something on your mind. Always a “what if”.
Sometimes your mind is going a mile a minute and your heart feels like it’s beating out of your chest. You freeze or panic, often at the most inopportune times. Or sometimes your thoughts keep you up at night.
Now you’re ready to stop living like that and figure out how to finally have peace, to slow down and enjoy the life you’ve created, the life you’ve worked so hard for.
Stress & Anxiety Isn’t Always Bad
In fact, those things often propel us to accomplish the things we want to accomplish. They act as motivators for us. But they’re only meant to be short-term, not life-long.
The problem is that the stress and anxiety have taken over, and now you want to reclaim your life and be yourself again.
This can be accomplished by breaking things into bite size pieces, not biting off more than you can chew. What do you think cause the stress in the first place? Yeah, trying to do more than you could handle at one time.
It can also be accomplished by developing a reasonable schedule for yourself, where you block off time for the things you need to get done, but also time for self-care, family time, and relaxation.
It might also mean facing some fear about disappointing others, failing, or not being good enough. It’s time to take a hard look at yourself, your values, and your priorities.
Together, we’ll tackle these things. We’ll create bite size pieces that feel manageable. We develop margin in your life so that everything doesn’t feel urgent. We’ll make schedules that work for you, instead of you working for your calendar. We’ll fight against the stress and anxiety, so that they no longer have control over you and you can finally relax and enjoy your life, even when things do get stressful from time to time.
Do you feel like you just aren’t motivated to do anything or go anywhere? You’d rather just stay home and sleep. You just sit and watch t.v. mindlessly or scroll through social media.
Are these feelings of depression interfering with your daily life and functioning? Do you find it hard to be productive at work? Are there days you just don’t get out of bed or get dressed?
Sometimes We Just Need a Reminder
When you’re caught in a cycle of depression, you may not be able to see your way out, so you get stuck even further in the pit.
We will work together, using the power of Positive Psychology, to recall the things that bring you joy and the things you’re grateful for. We’ll use visualization to project the happiness you wish for yourself. We will work together to overcome the depression that’s taken a hold of you, and bring you back into a place of balance and contentment. Sometimes, you just need someone else to come alongside you and remind you of all the good things.
Perfectionism & Work/Life Burnout or Balance
Perfectionism is What Made You Successful
But, there is such thing as too much of a good thing. Your high standards and lofty goals sounded great when you first ventured into the work world. You wanted to do the best, be the best. Your attention to detail and high standards definitely played an important role in your success.
Sometimes perfectionism actually gets in your way. It stops you from doing things, because you’re afraid it won’t be perfect, it won’t be your best. Do you feel like nothing you do is good enough? Chances are that you’ve felt that way for so long, you’ve come to believe it yourself. Often times I find that people who struggle with perfectionism often had very critical parents or caretakers, who made them feel that even their best wasn’t good enough, so they always tried to do better, be better. Perfection equaled love and acceptance. For them, it seemed that the only way they could be loved and acceptance was to be the best – to be perfect.
To make things worse, perfectionism is often rewarded in our society, so we don’t even realize the toll it’s taking on us until we’re buried under a massive “To Do” list, that we’re paralyzed to even begin.
Perfectionism often leads to procrastination, which then triggers shame and self-judgment.
While perfectionists are often indirectly rewarded in the workplace, this frequently causes increased anxiety, problems in work relationships, and even problems in relationships at home.
Through therapy, perfectionists can finally learn to let go of the unreasonable expectations they hold for themselves and begin to experience personal freedom. This involves learning about where these tendencies came from, how they’ve served you in your life, and how they’re holding you back.
Find Work/Life Balance
There are patterns in place that you can’t seem to break. Now you’re ready to change those beliefs, break those patterns, learn to value yourself, and take control of your own life. You’re ready to discover who you were really meant to be. Imposter Syndrome and feelings of insecurity are real. Stop hiding behind your fears & become the person you want to be.
Imagine What It Would Be Like To Be Free From Perfectionism
& Have A Good Work/Life Balance
You’d feel confident being yourself, not always trying to be someone one something you’re not, to live up to a perfect standard.
You would be able to relax and be fully present with your friends and family.
You would truly understand that your value and worth have nothing to do with how well you perform. You’d come to know that your value and worth come from inside and how you feel about yourself, not how others see you.
You want to discover yourself, find your purpose, & achieve personal fulfillment. You want to be that confident person who doesn’t worry about what everyone else thinks. You want to be comfortable in your own skin. And you want your voice to be heard and valued. I can help.
Together we can work to increase your self-confidence by decreasing your need to be perfect. We can work together to develop a work/life balance that isn’t based on performance or perfection.
Communication & Conflict Resolution
Does it feel like you and your partner just aren’t on the same page anymore? Do you feel like they just don’t hear you, or worse yet, that they just don’t care what you say or how you feel? Do you want to get your relationship back to where it used to be, when you enjoyed each other’s company, instead of dreading coming home every night?
So much of the disconnect we feel with our partner stems from a lack of communication or poor communication. In therapy, you’ll learn effective listening and communication skills, such as Reflective Listening, that will allow you and your partner to hear and understand each other in different ways.
Or does it feel like you and your partner just can’t agree on anything anymore? It seems like all you do is fight? Or when things are going well, you know it’s just a matter of time before the other shoe drops, and everything goes sideways?
This is often because we haven’t learned any conflict resolution skills or how to fight fairly. Obviously couples will disagree; that’s natural. It’s how you handle the disagreements that matter. In therapy, you’ll learn fair fighting rules and conflict resolution, so that you have tools in your toolbelt for when you do disagree.
There’s lots of things to consider before you say “I Do”. Frequently, I find that couples in the early stages of a relationship, are still so blinded by love, that they can’t see some red flags or haven’t taken the time to think about some of the bigger issues that will come up in a marriage.
Things go so much smoother and relationships last when the people involved talk through their values and goals together before the legally binding vows. It’s best for both people to know where the other person stands on big topics, such as finances, children, family roles, communication, etc.
In partnership with you, I can help you get all the cards on the table, so you can make an informed decision about spending the rest of your lives together and about what issues you may need to address more closely.